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I never thought I’d embrace the distinction “pessimism.”

Updated: Sep 20, 2020


I’ve been one small step ahead of what’s been occurring in our world for the past year. Before COVID-19.

There have been lots of warnings. Plenty of information that have indicated where we’re heading; as communities, countries and the world.

There’s no need to blame anyone or anything that got us here, other than maybe taking a good look at what we’ve individually been up to for the last decade.

In Sweden, there’s a proverb that directly translates to “The way you make your bed, is the way you’ll sleep.” If you look it up it translates to “what goes around comes around”. I like the Swedish version because it implies responsibility.


I’ve been struggling lately to distinguish between pessimism and realism, simply because the reality of what’s occurring seem pretty dim. It feels weird to connect to my happy-go-lucky personality when over 100,000 people have died, racism is raging, and political division is looking more like an integrated civil war.


I see many people posting their services on Facebook and advertising their solutions to people’s struggles. Sometimes it seems like a desperate attempt to make some quick cash, yet in many cases, it will offer some sanity, some relief, and most importantly, hope. For that I’m grateful. We need hope.


When all structures and everything we know crumbles in front of us, hope will carry us through. Hope will have us rise up, find inspiration, and take action towards what’s right.


So here’s my pessimism:

We’ve not even seen a fraction of what’s about to transpire.

Currently there’s a slow systematic occurrence that is mirroring back to us who we’ve been, what we’ve valued, and where we’ve stopped caring, all in the name of “comfort.”


Most of us talk about the environment, but we don’t recycle. We speak of peace, yet our home is tainted by grievances. We want to make a difference, yet we choose to binge watch Netflix shows. We judge addicts, yet we can’t seem to put our phone down. Let’s admit it. We’ve gone absolutely crazy.

Personally, I’m floored how hard it’s been to have the kids home during the stay at home order. Previous generations had it down. They knew how to do it. I don’t. I’m constantly failing to homeschool or set boundaries. Most of the time, I’d rather be on my phone, work, or stress out about whatever is served to me through social media, emails, or any other form of digital media that seem to penetrate the four walls of my home.


My pessimism is only here to protect me at this time. It helps me prepare, transform, and desire to evolve. That’s what’s happening right now. We are all evolving. I’m sure the caterpillar isn’t feeling optimistic about struggling inside the cocoon. Rather simply doing what’s needed, taking the next step.


For me, in this moment, I’ve replaced optimism and declaration with realism mixed with hope. This will evolve my innovative grounding force into re-imagination and a desire to rebuild a new future where we all can fly like the butterflies.

I am actually pessimistically excited. This is all part of the greater plan. No one said it would be easy. No one gave us the blue print. We have no clue how this will all play out. There is, however, one virtue that supersede everything, that crosses divides, that is fully embraced by all humans. That virtue is Gratitude.


And for that. I’m grateful.


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